I don't know why I find it such a challenge sometimes to write in my blog. Most times, I think it is because I get so caught up in the everyday stuff that I just don't make the time. Some of the time I think it is because really as a stay at home mother of 6 kids I don't really feel all that interesting. And sometimes I think it is because, while I love to write, I just don't know what to say, how much to share.
For those of you who know me IRL (in real life), you know that by nature I am a talker (shut up). I have a hard time being quiet, I like to share and probably share more than I should at times. I also change my mind 16 times a day on big and small things. I am sure that I make my friends head spin trying to keep up with what I am planning. I like to call it "idea ADD" but I am very sure that is politically incorrect. When it comes to writing it down for the world to see I wonder how much is too much.
I feel like if I write it down, it can't be changed, it's just out there for all the world to see and to judge. Or even worse for no one to even care about, to be invisible. And I think somewhere in the in between lies the truth. I fear being invisible everyday. I fear that in no way, when I go, will I leave MY mark on this world. That no one will remember me because, well, I am just not that interesting.
You see, I am just a mom, I have no unique ability, nothing that really makes me special. I am not a super volunteer, I am overly charismatic, or strong or anything really. Nothing about me makes others sit up and take notice.
But, on the other hand I am a mom, a wife, a woman, a daughter and a friend. Maybe, just maybe, that is enough. So I am going to challenge myself in a different way, to write, to share, and to not hide behind the fact that maybe no one will notice.
'til next time,
I think you are interesting. :) Can't wait to to see what you decide to share!
ReplyDeleteJill, I think one of the gifts you bring the world is the gift of being yourself. You live your life out in the open and say what you think. By doing this you give others permission to do the same. So whether you think anyone is listening or not, keep writing! It is for you as much as anyone else.
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